The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
NAPEAGUE, New York (AP) -- A boat captain who sent a message out to sea in a bottle says he received a reply from Britain -- accusing him of littering.
"I kind of felt like no good deed goes unpunished," Harvey Bennett, 55, told the East Hampton Star.
The plastic bottle was one of five that Bennett placed in the ocean off New York's Long Island in August.
Last month, he excitedly opened a letter from England, and was stunned by the reply:
"I recently found your bottle while taking a scenic walk on the beach by Poole Harbour. While you may consider this some profound experiment on the path and speed" of "oceanic currents, I have another name for it, litter.
"You Americans don't seem to be happy unless you are mucking about somewhere," says the letter, signed by Henry Biggelsworth of Bournemouth, in the southern county of Dorset.
I used to live in that part of the world. It's mainly populated by retired people who have nothing better to do than complain about stuff. Kinda like Florida, only less sunny.
