The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Here is a list of things I like (in no particular order):
Curry (because it's tasty and brilliant) Tea (because it's tasty and brilliant and wet. 1345, by the way.) My cat (because he's tasty and brill... no, just Brilliant. Oh, and he looks like BATMAN!) The Clifton Suspension Bridge (because it's brilliant. And high.) Cheese (because it's cheesy) My bed (because it's cheesy... er... I mean comfy!) Pie Charts (because they remind me of pie) Rhubarb (oh man, rhubarb is lovely. yum) Concave mirrors (because they make me look funny. So do spoons)
Here is a list of things I don't like (again, in no particular order):
Cyclists wearing lycra (because they're the ones that are wankers) Ford Kas (because they look bloody stupid) Vending machine coffee (because it's like drinking hot liquid poo) Dog poo (because it reminds me of vending machine coffee) Wind (the blowy weather kind, not the bum kind. i like the bum kind. It makes me laugh.) Orange Highlighter pens (they're so shit. Yellow is much better) Fish (yuck) Argos (40 goddamn minutes to find... NOTHING AT ALL! Why would you go there instead of the internet. What sort of retard shops ar Argos? Grr) Not being allowed to swear (Swearing is funny. And cathartic. And funny. Arse.)
Here is a list of things I've eaten in the last 24 hours (in approximate reverse order):
Golden Grahams Strawberry yogurt Quiche (yeah, I know. It's what happens when you let Catfish make the dinner) Spinach Baby plum tomatoes Beetroot Grated carrot Alpen Ceral Bar Roast chicken sandwiches.
Here is a list of things I can see from my desk at work:
1 Laptop 2 CCTV cameras 3 trees 4 bins 5 cars 6 no-parking notices 7 air con units 8 pens (okay... I may have had to get a couple out to maintain the pattern) 9 bollards
I like lists that evolve over time, that help me remember stuff - like shopping lists and to do lists.... they have to help me though and be all about me, obviously
__________________
I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson