The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
What is it with girls and ‘handbag arms’? Why do girls feel the need to wave their non-handbag bearing arm around as they walk?
I was walking through town yesterday lunchtime and witnessed a particularly spectacular and dangerous example of this. This rather short, squat girl was walking ahead of me. Her right arm was clamped down on her handbag, whilst the other appeared to be spasming. It’s possible that it wasn’t actually attached to her body and was, in fact, independently mobile. Its movement ranged from flopping around like a fish next to her waist to being extended perpendicularly at almost 90 degrees from her body. At times it appeared to be the subject of some form of electro-shock therapy. Had she been a tall person, passers-by may well have been in danger of losing eyes or teeth. As it was she almost punched several passing blokes in the groin with it.
So… those members of the female persuasion, perhaps you could explain this arm-flailing requirement to me. As for the blokes... well... just talk amongst yourselves for a bit!
I'm not a girl but I reckon its a balance thing. Throughout my life I have observed numerous females with tardis like handbags, the weight of the handbag would appear to require a counterbalance, hence the flailing arm
I'm not a scientist, but I think I qualify as someone who can answer as I do have the requisite girly parts...
I think Santa is actually pretty close to right here. If you think about it, when you walk you move your arms.. if you've got one arm not moving, the other arm is going to move around.. and if you've got a big gigantor bag like some people do - or a bag that has straps that make it impossible to keep on your shoulder unless you tilt yourself at a near 45 degree angle, your whole body is going to be thrown off, and your arm will be unleashed upon the unsuspecting groins of passerbys.
It is for this reason that I use backpacks or pants with lots of pockets. I'm really just thinking of your groins.
Were her hips swaying unnaturally as well? Ive seen girls do that - overexaggerate hip sway to attract the boys. Exaggerating one movement could very well exaggerate others.
Or there's always the case that she was thinking of groins too
My wife isn't a particularly bad arm-waver, as you say ... but she just happens to be just the right height. In other words, while walking normally, her hand is exactly at my crotch level. I've taken several really good shots just for walking behind her when she's not really paying attention to what she's doing. We even have a name for it: flail (which in my humble opinion, is much better than arm-wave, silly cookie man). When I say, "whoa, watch the flailing!" she knows exactly what I mean.
I wonder if that is why Arab men make the women behind them. Maybe the entire ethnic group just got fed up with getting punched in the crotch.
bonniepirateanne wrote: i've only recently started carrying a handbag, it's useful for carrying kingbilly's wallet and ipod in..
anyway it takes all the hands i have to stop it falling off my shoulder onto the ground so i dont feel really able to comment
I so feel your pain... I'm convinced that's what shoulder pads were meant to remedy in the 80's. Cuz really who WANTS to look like a linebacker unless you ARE a linebacker - but at least your bag had something to hook onto.
The girl in question had a tiny, tiny bag. And it was pink.
I don't thing size matters... The problem is not being able to move the handbag arm, hence the other arm 'flails' in an attempt to achieve aerodynamic harmony.
We should run an experiment. Inhibit movement in the non-handbag arm and see if they fall over.
I'd rather take forks to the eyes repeatedly rather than have to see a good majority of people in lycra catsuits I include myself in that. I suppose its all well and good that there's no need for most of us to be aerodynamic.
The King decrees that it it acceptable for the girls to wear the lycra catsuits. Any men, however that indulge in this practice will be put to death immediately on account of it being wrong. Seven kinds of wrong. With a pinch of nasty and a sprig of nauseating.
I include myself in that. I suppose its all well and good that there's no need for most of us to be aerodynamic.
