The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
I'm gonna move house - but its no simple move. For a start there will be 3 trucks. We are buying the house off the woman who is buying hours - so we have to co-ordinate getting out of ours with getting in to hers, with the same movers. Thats 2 of the trucks.
At the same time, my 'stuff' which is currently frozen solid in a warehouse, will be brought to a new house in the 3rd truck. Which has to be done on time so it doesnt sit in the street blocking it up -
At the same time I have to co-ordinate 1 bank, 2 firms of solicitors (both of which have proven themselves to be useless at one point or another during this process) and 2 sets of estate agents (one of which is criminally bad) to ensure that cash, keys and other stuff all happens on time. So we dont spend hours standing around...
Oh and to top it all off, it will likely by minus 7 degrees and snowing. I once moved on 'the coldest day on record' - but I dont remember it being that cold...
Bezzy knows how well I do with pressure - he knows how calm I stay when people dont do as they're told, or just stand around doing nothing, or are late. So this should be fun!
Hopefully Susan has some valium on standby....
Anyone wanna come and help? (Dazza is already helping Thursday, so he's let off)
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I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson