Answering the phone

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Answering the phone

Calvin · Really Bored Member

I wouldn't answer a phone BUT I experienced calling someone who was ... I only found out because I requested what these flashing noises were...NOT nice!

But luckely there's no such thing like "smell" phone!

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

on the subject of toilets,

what about when you go to the bog at work (or anywhere public) and you see another guy coming out of the cubicle. Am I the only one who then avoids that cubicle cos I dont want to sit on another mans warmth?

Also, being in the next cubicle to someone you work with, or worse, the boss, and you see each other going in, you're both trying not to be the 1st to splash!

Calvin · Really Bored Member

Damo_daly wrote:

Am I the only one who then avoids that cubicle cos I dont want to sit on another mans warmth?

Oh my ****! You musn't ever SIT on a public toilet: that's the first thing a girl learns. You never know what might jump at you

But for the warmth: I hate coming to a seminar or similar and getting a warm seat (like chair)!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Damo_daly wrote:

Am I the only one who then avoids that cubicle cos I dont want to sit on another mans warmth?

No. No you're not.

Damo_daly wrote:

Also, being in the next cubicle to someone you work with, or worse, the boss, and you see each other going in, you're both trying not to be the 1st to splash!

One of the ultimate nightmare scenarios, that. Better to splash than fart, though.

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Calvin wrote:

But for the warmth: I hate coming to a seminar or similar and getting a warm seat (like chair)!

On the other hand, coming home on a cold day and finding that red hot patch on the sofa where that cat's been sleeping all day is fantastic!

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

Again, on the subject of toilets,

does this happen with anyone else? If you eat sugar puffs then go for a pee a wee while later it smells EXACTLY like sugar puffs! amazing!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

I think you may have mentioned this before, dude.

Very cool, though. Thanks.

And you know what happens if you drink too much stout, don't you? My little brother experimented with it one summer.

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

One night i was on the guiness after going for an indian, on the way home i really had to go, you know, like in a bush...

the story takes a turn for the worse here so i wont go on unless requested to!

-- Edited by Damo_daly at 16:23, 2005-08-09

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Do it. You know you want to...

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

the king has spoken, so apologies to everyone else in advance...

like I said, I had been on the curry and guiness all night, i was walking to get a taxi with some friends when I had to go, so i went in some bushes near a stream, but i was so drunk I kinda got some down the outside back of my boxers. im my drunken state, i thought i would be a great idea, rather than remove them, to hack them off with a broken beck's bottle, which took about 20 minutes.

Nobody believed I'd only nipped in for a quick pee...

do I win a fiver?

Copper · **Superhero Extraordinaire**

Damo_daly wrote:

= im my drunken state, i thought i would be a great idea, rather than remove them, to hack them off with a broken beck's bottle,

And the worst that happened was pee on the boxers??? Blimey, you are a lucky lucky man.

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

erm... no, not pee...

think curry + guiness

I did warn you!

Copper · **Superhero Extraordinaire**

Still, I think you are a lucky man...

Batman O'Leary · A.K.A. Damo_Daly I have a cool name...

lucky?

to be honest things deteriorated from there, but thats not for this forum!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

I'd be grateful if you could just point me towards the forum that you'll be posting the rest of the story on...

BrianS · Still Number One

Damo_daly wrote:

on the subject of toilets,
what about when you go to the bog at work (or anywhere public) and you see another guy coming out of the cubicle. Am I the only one who then avoids that cubicle cos I dont want to sit on another mans warmth?
!

This very thing happened to me once. Another much older guy in my office was going into the "cubicle" as I coming out. He says "Good, you warmed it up for me" All I could thing was "NASTY". I was about sick. Unfortunately I work in a 100 year old bulding. The toilets have to be at least 50. I spend prolly 3 minutes wiping the seat down before I ever sit down. And to have this guy come in and be happy that my sweaty ass print was still there.

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Heh. Nice, Brian. Maybe you should add that particular statistic to your profile!

-- Edited by ddvmor at 18:03, 2005-08-09

bonniepirateanne · Date: Aug 9, 2005

there is a new awesome japanese time restuarant opened up in belfast (which serves equally awesome sushI) and they have the BEST public loo EVER..

i've never seen it before.. but over the top of the seat is a plastic (kinda like the plastic on a supermarket bag) layer.. and when you swipe your hand over this little sensor.. it pulls it round into one side of the loo seat giving you a new layer of plastic wrap to sit on..

it's kinda hard to describe but it's sooo coooool

swipe swipe swipe

oh look i found a link!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Cool, it may be. But it's kinda overkill, dont ya think?

NateO · Vice JDK and Man of the People

Copper wrote:

Still, I think you are a lucky man...

The curiosity is strong in this one.

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Presumably, whenever Copp does for a crap in the bushes, she makes more of a mess.

Poor Copp. She should see the doctor about that...

Copper · **Superhero Extraordinaire**

Damo_daly wrote:
im my drunken state, i thought i would be a great idea, rather than remove them, to hack them off with a broken beck's bottle, which took about 20 minutes.

Helllloooooo!? He hacked his pants off with a broken bottle??.

This sounds like a tricky task already without the added complication of guinness and the **CUCUMBER**s. I reiterate, therefore, that he is a lucky lucky man (presuming he is still the proud owner of all the usual biological boy bits).

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Copper wrote:

...he is a lucky lucky man (presuming he is still the proud owner of all the usual biological boy bits).

Ah.

So you don't crap in the bushes often then?

Anyway - you seem to be making a big assumption here.

Damo... do you still have all your tackle? Is it in one peice and relatively unscarred?

HaloBurn · **Dad** Yarrr...

ddvmor wrote:

Copper wrote:
...he is a lucky lucky man (presuming he is still the proud owner of all the usual biological boy bits).

Ah.
So you don't crap in the bushes often then?
Anyway - you seem to be making a big assumption here.
Damo... do you still have all your tackle? Is it in one peice and relatively unscarred?

I can't believe your enquiring into another man's tackle

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

I'm asking on Copper's behalf. She's a lady, see and far too delicate to ask these questions herself.

HaloBurn · **Dad** Yarrr...

lol nice recovery.

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

I thought so.

Copper · **Superhero Extraordinaire**

ddvmor wrote:

I'm asking on Copper's behalf. She's a lady, see and far too delicate to ask these questions herself.

HaloBurn · **Dad** Yarrr...

Copper wrote:

ddvmor wrote:
I'm asking on Copper's behalf. She's a lady, see and far too delicate to ask these questions herself.

I'll rephrase that to WAS a nice recovery rflmao