The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Several large images of a man's penis with a yellow bow tied around it have been taken down from car parks and places close to schools in Lewes.
Sussex police have interviewed people at offices close to where the A3 and A4-sized images were found.
The posters have also been sent off for fingerprint analysis.
The force is also investigating whether it is some sort of protest, as a number of the images included a caption which read: "Fees set to rise later this year."
A Sussex Police spokesman said: "We are aware of these posters and a local PCSO [Police Community Support Officer] has removed a few, but we have not received any formal complaints.
"However, we are concerned that the posters have appeared quite close to local schools and they may well cause offence or distress.
"However, from what we've seen, if this is a self-portrait, the artist won't be in a hurry to be identified."