The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
My boss has just had a moan at me cos he couldn't find a particular piece of paper in a particular folder from 3 months ago.
This piece of paper is the daily output from an access based audit which I can reproduce electonically and provide him with the specific number he needs in about a 10th of the time it takes him to leave his desk, walk to the cupboard, locate the relevant ring folder, leaf through it to locate the relevant date's print, and study the print to find the account number he's looking for.
When I suggested to him that the whole reason we store this electronically is so that stuff doesn't get mislaid and that we can find the info we need much much easier by running a search in access, he explained that we needed to keep the reams and reams of paper and that they were very important.
Whilst I'm sure he's right, I can't help theorising that:
A) he has a secret fetish for stacks of paper and quitely gets off on it at his desk; or
B) he has a secret agenda for world domination that involves the total destruction of the rain forests!
I think your boss and my old boss are related. We had 4 lateral filing cabinets and two 4 drawer cabinets stuffed to the point of overflowing with old reports that I could have pulled out of the database in the push of one command button. *sigh* If you find out it really was a fetish, don't tell me. I don't want to picture my boss getting off at her desk