The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
So, yesterday I had to trott off to London for a meeting. That in itself is not unusual as I work in the City at least one day a week. But I do try and avoid being up there on Monday and Friday because so many people travel those days that it puts the infrastructure under extra pressure that it doesnt need.
Now, having to be in London for 10am I decided to jump on the 7am train, getting me to London at 8.30 and round the tube by 9am - that allowed me a bit of time to 'press the flesh' with colleagues (networking is most important) and settle down before the 6 hours (yes 6 hours) of meeting.
It all started going south about 20 mins in. We came to a stop and were told "There a signal problems on the line, and whilst some trains are being cancelled, this wont happen to us - it will just be a bit slow getting to Reading."
40 mins later (an hour in and we've travelled the same distance we normally go in 20 mins) and we're told - "Actually we are now cancelling this train so can you all please sprint across the station and cram on to the remaining train that leaves in about a nano-second's time" -
We all crammed on to the train for a very uncomfortable final hour to London.
Once in London, we were told that my normal tube line was closed "Because someone was taken ill on a train" - now I may be a little uncaring but doesnt it make sense, if someone falls ill on a train, to MOVE THEM OFF THE TRAIN!?
So I ended up jumping on another line round to a tube station kinda near where I needed to be, only to have to then RUN across Southwark bridge to get there 1 minute late for the meeting proper - which sucked.
(the journey home, though it didnt start until 6.30, was mercifully straight forward) -
Anyone else finding themselves in this position? it seems to be happening more and more in the UK...
__________________
I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
My journey to work yesterday morning started at 6.40am and consisted of a 17 minute car journey with a guaranteed space in a security patrolled car park at the other end.
Once I'd completed my full day's work (at 11.30am) my journey home took forever - 18 minutes!
You've missed the crucial element of this story. The one important piece of information that we need to allow us to sleep at night. Without it, we will wonder for the rest of our days. It will prey on our minds and drive us to dristraction.
...Ben
