The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
This is genius. It's a list of things that an american soldier in Bosnia was told he wasn't allowed to do.
A few of my favourite things that Skippy isn't allowed to do:
16. Must get a haircut even if it tampers with my Samson like powers.
33. Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
34. (Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I *did* bring enough for everybody.
49. Not allowed to trade military equipment for magic beans.
54. Napalm sticks to kids is *not* a motivational phrase.
77. The MP checkpoint is not an Imperial Stormtrooper roadblock, so I should not tell them You dont need to see my identification, these are not the droids you are looking for.