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The Jammie Dodger Bored Board -> JDBB -> The Jammie Dodger Bored Board -> Chuck Norris Facts
Post Info TOPIC: Chuck Norris Facts
NateO


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and Man of the People




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Date: Aug 5, 2007
Chuck Norris Facts
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Dudes, it's time for a little non-fictional reading on the most dangerous man alive!

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/

Here are a few, of many, that caught my attention:

  • Guns don't kill people. Chuck Norris kills People.
  • The leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart Disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
  • Chuck Norris does not go hunting, hunting suggests that there might be a
    possibility of failure.....Chuck Norris goes killing.
  • Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
  • Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
  • The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
  • Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
  • Chuck Norris made a mistake once. It was perfect...

biggrin laughing.giflmao.gifthumbsup.gif



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ddvmor


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I saw Chuck Norris on the TV when I was in the Ststes. It was rubbish, but Chuck Norris was cool.

But who would win in a fight between Chuck Norris and Jack Bauer? And maybe John McLean for good measure?

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NateO


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Chuck Norris would roundhouse both of those dudes, and Bruce Lee, all at the same time, instantly killing all 3. Not even close, dude. wink

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ddvmor


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But John McLean is a lucky, lucky sonovabitch. And he says 'Yippie Ki Ay, motherf*cker'! He'd get lucky. He might just make it out alive and get his mate King Leonidas in to help out!

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Truckman


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My favorite: When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris...Ben



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JonnyStead


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Heh that is cool

I think McLean would probably win but we would be horribly banged up at the end of the fight and yet still manage to get up and walk down the road...

How about Chuck Norris vs Rambo?

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NateO


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JonnyStead wrote:

How about Chuck Norris vs Rambo?

Chuck Norris smokes him, easilly. Keep in mind that Chuck Norris isn't just an actor, he's the real deal:

http://www.chucknorris.com/html/biog.html

But prior to that, Chuck was a martial arts star, winning many martial arts championships including being a six-time undefeated World Professional MiddleWeight Karate Champion. Chuck was also a renowned teacher in the martial arts. Some of his students were Steve McQueen, Bob Barker, Priscilla Presley and Donnie & Marie Osmond.

From 1964 to 1968, Chuck won many State, National, and International amateur karate titles. In 1968, Chuck fought and won the World Professional MiddleWeight Karate championships by defeating the World's Top Fighters. He held that title until 1974 when he retired undefeated.

In 1968, Chuck was inducted into the Black Belt Hall of Fame as Fighter of the Year. In 1975, he was inducted as Instructor of the Year and in 1977, Chuck received the honor of Man of the Year.

In 1997, Chuck achieved another milestone in his life by being the first man ever in the Western Hemisphere to be awarded an 8th degree Black Belt Grand Master recognition in the Tae Kwon Do system. This was a first in 4,500 years of tradition.



wink



-- Edited by NateO at 23:31, 2007-08-07

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JonnyStead


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Holy crap - the first in 4500 years? thats good going -

but not as impressive as teaching Priscilla Presley to fight - she went on to become light heavyweight champion of the world when she knocked out Tony Tubbs in the 9th at Madison Square Garden in 1993 -

Some of the above may not be quite right...

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ddvmor


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Yeah. Wasn't it 1994?

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JonnyStead


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Well spotted!

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"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
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