The executive... stapler?

Yes my company is a Group - with various divisions or businesses. Each one has its own executive, the Chief Exec of which reports into the Groups Chief Exec who sits on the Board. - my boss reports directly into that Executive which is why I get to mingle with them alot.

The UK part of the business made a profit of about £1,500,000,000 ($3bn) last year so its pretty sizeable but only represents about a third of total profits of the group.

Hope that clears it up.

-- Edited by JonnyStead at 21:54, 2007-06-12

And there you have it - the last of that sought of sh*t I'm putting up with. Ta ta.

So, going back on topic for a brief moment (reckless, I know) I went into 'Fresh & Wild' on my way home from work yesterday evening. Not, as the name suggests some sort of strip joint, but a poncey, overpriced organic food shop.

My rational for going into a poncey overpriced organic food shop was that it's next door to another shop I had to visit and I couldn't be bothered to stop off at a supermarket on the way home.

So while I was in the poncey overpriced organic food shop, I noticed a large banner handing from the ceiling which read 'It has been proven that Man is the cause of global warming'.

Well, I said to myself, if it's on a banner hanging from the ceiling of a poncey overpriced organic food shop, it must be true. So obviously the debate we've been having on this thread - the environmental one, not the wholly unreasonable picking-on-Stead one - is moot.

Pff.

Anywhoo, I took this up with the slightly foreign girl behind the counter when I went to pay. The conversation went something like this.

JDK: Afternoon.
Girl: Hello. Do you need a carrier bag?
JDK: Yes, please.

The girl didn't look impressed. The sign behind the till suggested that I was supposed to save the planet by bringing my own.

Girl: Here.
JDK: Thanks. Can I ask you about that banner over there.
Girl: Which one?
JDK: The one that says 'It has been proven that Man is the cause of global warming'
Girl: What about it?
JDK: Well, it's not true, is it?
Girl: Of course it is.
JDK: Far from it actually. And I'm pretty sure that the presence of the sign is libellous.
Girl: What?

I'm pretty sure that this was the point that I lost her.

JDK: As one of the 'Men' to which it refers, I can confirm that I have not been convicted in court of causing global warming. Therefore the sign is libellous. It's untrue.
You should probably take it down - or at least amend it to 'Its possible that Man may be a partial contributary factor to global warming'.
Girl: That's £14.26, please.
JDK: Is this bag biodegradeable?
Girl: No.

I can't be certain as I was facing the other way at the time, but I'm pretty sure she made an attempt on my life as I left the poncey overpriced organic food shop.

-- Edited by ddvmor at 11:02, 2007-06-13

I can't believe you didn't quiz them on whether the banner was printed with environmentally friendly inks!

PS So what did you get for your £14.26?

Not if you bought organic from Tesco!

I'm just waiting for the chuggers to try and harrang me in the street about global warming instead of Oxfam or Shelter - I'll give them carbon foootprint - I'll give them a carbon footprint right up their greenhouse emissions with my size 8 Cat boots.

That is quite entertaining, can't wait for the reply!

On the subject of chuggers, I was highly amused, earlier in the week, to spot an Amnesty chugger deep in conversation with an evangalising member of an unidentified religion/cult. I feel this sort of thing should be encouraged (maybe also encompassing market researchers) to make the streets safer for the rest of us.

I want to know if you really really had this conversation?

Sorry HaloBurn, I figured that should they ex/implode in a matter+antimatter kind of way I'd still have been close enough to notice & watching anything less would've been somewhat of an anti-climax!

Well they came back to me nice and quickly!

Thank you for your interest in the c-change trust climate change banner in the Fresh and Wild store in Bristol.
I am sorry that you experienced some distress by what you read. If i may first directly respond to your concerns about our facts.

Climate change is now widely accepted across the scientific community as a reality.
The most up to date and solid scientific evidence for climate change presented by the IPCC may be viewed here : http://www.ipcc.ch/SPM2feb07.pdf

Far from being a false slogan, this IPCC report is accepted by almost every government in the world as solid fact.
From the world's largest corporations to the smallest business in every country, people are organising to reduce their carbon dioxide emissions on the basis of this evidence.
Many now realise that If we do not reduce our emissions of CO2 the Earth's temperature will increase to dangerous levels in the future.

Everybody produces some CO2 so we are all responsible in some small way, yet we can all do something really simple to reduce those emissions.
We must stress that this is certainly not a matter for feeling any guilt, the banners simply remind us that we are being required to act.

Fresh and Wild has supported the c-change trust in an important in-store awareness campaign concerning the carbon emissions behind food miles.
This campaign is not aimed at selling products but simply to allow valued customers to make a more informed consumer choice.

I hope this answers your question.
With kind regards

[...], Co-founder

If after reviewing the facts yourself perhaps you would like to offset your carbon emissions online? If so then please visit our website at www.thec-changetrust.org

It's nice that they interpreted my irrational need to wind up a faceless corporation as 'distress'.

So basically its the usual wishy washy claptrap that gets rolled out by climate change activists with it reference to the infamous and contentious IPCC report and bold claims about carbon dioxide and so-on. I'm still not seeing anything that actually proves the influence of Man on the climate. In fact the report that he asks me to look at states:

The understanding of anthropogenic warming and cooling influences on climate has improved since the Third Assessment Report (TAR), leading to very high confidence7 that the globally averaged net effect of human activities since 1750 has been one of warming...

"A very high confidence" is in a whole different league to "it has been conclusively proven". Which makes the statement

Far from being a false slogan...

a little bit moot.

Next up: ddvmor gets narky about the use of the word 'Man' in the statement 'It has been proven that Man is the cause of global warming'. Sounds a bit sexist to me. Is the shop discriminating against me? Do women not create greenhouse gasses? I know... women who wear stiletto heels make smaller footprints, so...

Ho hum. That's my fun for the week. :) I'm going to go and offset my carbon emissions online now. I bet they want my credit card number...

Yeah they want at least £80 or £180 based on their average what a scam

I'm gonna start murdering non-believers - keep the planet (and my job) safe

Now, where's my Katana?