The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
This evening I had a visitor in my home... one of those people we love to hate, a double glazing salesman. He had come around to measure up and show me a sample of his windows, seeing as I have decided the quote is reasonable and I might take up the offer.
So, he is knelt down outside the patio door looking at the concrete under the step, and Rochester is suddenly there licking his bald head!!
My dad used to be a window salesman - he was really good at it yet hated it because so many people that signed up he didn't think could afford it and it made him sad
not that I'm suggesting you're one of those doctor
This isn't the first time Rocheser's licked a bald head, though. He's something of a serial baldy licker. I have a mate who's now in his sixties - an ex copper. He stopped coming to visit me because whenever he sat on my sofa, Rochester would climb up onto the back, sit behind him and lick his head. Everyone else thought it was hilarious.
Whenever a bald person comes into a room with the Roach, you can see him eyeing up that shiny dome. Probably wondering how it'll taste!
