The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Woke up this morning with the intention of cycling into work despite being shattered/knackered (choose whichever one causes you the least offence) only to be greated with the noise of the rain bouncing of the shed roof like bullets. Then it eased of by the time i got into work but now its really really dark, wet and miserable. If this continues i may have to win the lottery and move to sunnier climes