The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
A couple of years ago, one of our branches was presented with a bank statement from another bank as proof of address. The branch suspected it was a forgery because there was not one, not two, but THREE spelling mistakes in the standard banky text at the foot of the statement - you know, the bit that says 'X bank is registered at Y street in London and is regulated by so-and so and whatnot'. Well, it turned out that this bank had misprinted a load of it's headed paper and taken the decision to use it anyway.
So there you go. It's not just dodgy ex-Soviet states that do that sort of thing!
I once worked for a bank that started giving out promotional mints to kids - even after we found out that they had massive laxative qualities, we kept giving them out! that was kinda cool though...
We also used to spend £14 on each pen in the banking hall on the basis that they were theft proof - we stopped using them after they were all nicked...
__________________
I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
