The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Never mind the biscuits, fix the leaks! YORKSHIRE Water boss Richard Sears suggests late workmen should turn up with a pack of Jammie Dodgers to appease irate customers. It's a nice idea, but wouldn't it be a better idea if our utility companies spent more time working out how they could keep our bills down? Gas, electricity and water bills have all seen substantial rises over the last couple of years, with little sign of anything to stop these fat cat firms from charging us whatever they like. Richard Sears pointed out that his Jammie Dodger idea was a suggestion for the gas industry and his company had such an excellent customer relations record that no biscuits were required. He's half right. Instead of the biscuits, Yorkshire Water should be heading down to the grocers and buying up leeks for their customers, because that's what they seem to be good at. A whopping 293 million litres of water were lost every day in Yorkshire last year because of leaks. That's enough water a year to fill more than 100,000 Olympic size swimming pools, water the rest of us are paying for in the form of another few quid on our annual bills. And that really does take the biscuit.