The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
I just found my old school prayer - I remember it still:
"O God, our Father, we pray for your blessing on this school. Help us to work with courage and sincerity, to live together in kindliness and honesty. Make us generous in thought, unselfish in action, that all who go forth hence may carry with them the vision of your Kingdom and the knowledge of your Truth, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen."
Yep. An all girls school, complete with pervy PE teachers who used to stand and watch the exit of the showers to make sure you were washing properly. It makes my skin crawl thinking back on that.
Going back to the migies, I was in scotland (around fort william) about a year ago, and I picked up on a saying..."If you kill a migie, a million come to it's funeral" Believe me, you couldn't move for the things, putting a tent up was incredibly unorganised, and it's the fastest I've ever moved.. Never again will I go in migie season
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If a cat always lands on it's feet, and toast always lands butter side down. What happens if you strap toast to the back of a cat?
We camped on the shores of Loch Lomond a few years back. Idyllic setting. Until dusk when the wildest party of midges you ever did see kicked off. You should have seen the people going to the water point to fill up their Aquarolls - covered from head to foot with only slit for their eyes to see where they were going - hilarious! (until your own water runs out!!!)