The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Okey dokey ... in mild contrast to the fluffy bunny thread please use this one to rant about everything that has got reet on your nerves in 2005. I realise each post in this thread could be enormous ... but that's OK, that's the nature of a rant.
I'll start shall I?
The question, however, is where to begin. Right, lets start off with education in the UK. It came to my attention that this years A-Level English Literture syllabus including the reading of Harry Potter!! Harry f*****g Potter! And that revision notes were being given out in the form of TXT SPK. TEXT SPEAK!!! FFS ... English Lit. should be about using the English language, not ABUSING it ... and as for reading Hrry Pttr, well, it's hardly Dickins, Shakespear/Bacon, Shelley, Keats, Lawrence, et al now is it.
Music, I've actually liked a lot of the music this year ... pop has become just that again for the most part, good songs well made and I like that. I don't like the ever increasing trend for making the CDs so loud in the master that all dynamics are lost. I do that on my own stuff, I know, but I'm not professional. I'm also hating the trend for "nu-post-punk" bands of not tuning their instruments. It's not big and it's not clever so buy a felching tuner!
Politics. UK : New Labour ... Old Tory, same bloody horse. Old rant I know but this year has just been getting worse. How many times has Blunkett resigned and rejoined this week? Who knows. US : Bush ... how come he can afford to invade every middle eastern country in existance but can't properly help out hurricane victims in his own country!
People, OK this is the biggy. Why is it that people over react to every single news broadcast in this country lately? Why do people insist on panic buying fuel, if you didn't do it, there would be no panic! Why don't they see! Why do people insist on using fog lights in a light mist? Why do people drive at 7 mph when a severe weather warning is issued regardless of whether or not that severe weather has arrived? Why to meterologists insist on issuing severe weather warnings when they know full well that the "coldest winter on record" will actually be quite mild? Why does everyone keep saying "the big freeze" like we live in Siberia? Why won't it snow in Bristol (OK, that's not people but I'm on a roll now). Gargh!
I'm annoying myself now so I'll stop. Please release your rants upon us here ... it's good for the soul.
So called Nu-punk bands are NOT punk - singing all 'cor blimey guv'nor' does not make you punk especially when you are not righting your own songs and taking baths frequently - punk was supposed to be dangerous and edgy...
25% of school children in the UK leave school technically illiterate but we are focussing more and more on teaching them european languages instead... well thats ok then...
Try buying an insurance policy in the UK now! - But be prepared to be deluged by compliance documentation and scripts because you are as a customer considered too dumb to understand what you are buying.
Over mastering music is a disgrace - they only do it so MP3s will sound reasonable - less is more in a mix - if you want something dynamic listen to classical - they manage it!
Hoorah and huzzah for me! - have a good new year hengle me old mate - you're a top bloke (if a bit beardy)
__________________
I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
Cyclists at night, all dressed in black with no lights.
Crappy newspapers presenting me with headlines that clearly display their illiteracy. For example:
Other crappy newspapers of the middle class national tabloid type passing off gossip and outright lies as news - particularly when they're about the company I work for.
My parents for continuing to read said middle class crappy national tabloid, despite that fact that I have demonstrated again and again that they're full of crap.
Dan Brown for making a f*cking fortune off a really crappy book.
I could go on. We need a counter to this thread now...
Went out and bought lumber so I could reinforce my desk and put heavier things on it... such as my larger TV that's just hanging out on my dining room floor of no use to anyone. So I buy 2x4s specifically because I had the measurements all worked out for 2x4s. I brought in all my measurements and had the guy cut the pieces (the unfortunate part of an apartment.. had to leave my table saw in NY ) Anyway, I start putting the frame together only to find out I'm 1/2" short on height. So I recheck all the measurements and cuts... everythings right... so I recheck the lumber only to find out my 2x4s are actually 1.5x3.5s!
So my rant goes out to all those who can't label products properly! Basserds all of ya!