Apparently there's an anual award for bed sex scenes in literery fiction:

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Bad sex book prize for journalist

Journalist and author Giles Coren's novel Winkler has won the Bad Sex in Fiction Award for the most awkward description of an intimate encounter.

The food critic's book describes a sexual act between a man and a woman, in which she "she scratched his back deeply with the nails of both hands".

The rest of the winning passage is unprintable for a family audience.

The annual award pitted Coren against writers including John Updike, Salman Rushdie, Ben Elton and Paul Theroux.

It is for "crude, tasteless" sexual depictions in published literature.

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I was particularly impressed with Ben Elton's entry:

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Elton's extract from his book included the following:

"'Ooh-la-la!' she breathed as he smelt the clean aroma of her short bobbed hair and the rain-sodden grass around it. 'Oooh-la-jolly well-la!'

"And so they made love together in the pouring rain, with Nurse Murray emitting a stream of girlish exclamations which seemed to indicate that she was enjoying herself."

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