The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
...vigil. One vigil for each regular who hasn't visited over the weekend so far. Stead, you can join me in this if you like. Looks like I'm gonna need some help here - We'll have enough candles to light up Piccadilly Square.
One for the King One for Vic One for KT One for Nate One for Mitch One for Sharon One for Joe
KUM BY YAH. <I've got a sore throat now> <humble apologies for any regular I have omitted - it's nothing personal, just my memory that's all>
Hello. I am here, just a bit quite as I'm on day 3 of food poisoning (ugh, ugh & triple ugh!) Convieniently I have lots of candles in my bathroom, so I can join you from there!
The only culprits I can think of are a microwave curry (veggie, no rice) or some cottage cheese, hardly the usual suspects. The guy I share an office with was off with a stomch bug, but as he was last in last Friday that seems unlikely too.
Think I'm over the worst now, certainly hope so, not eaten for 3 days & I'm bloody starving!
Trust me, they sound yummy, unfortunatley it's not the sound of food I've a problem with! I have managed a small amount of mashed potato & a little cauliflower, hopefully I'll have something more substantial tomorrow.
On the plus side at least my summer clothes should fit now!
I've been to my parents overnight. A bit disappointing as they don't seem to be interested in anything other than where they've been, what they're about to do, how ill they've both been, what they neighbours had for dinner last weekend & why they planted runner beans instead of plants in their garden. I have totally had my fill now of what my 2 sisters & 2 nans & 8 aunties & umpteen cousins & uncle Tom Cobbly and all have been up to. We could have done with a nice relaxed visit, but it just didn't happen. Bummer all round really.
Witness my triumphant return from the wastelands of Parental Visitation.
Vic and I have just spent the entire weekend (and by entire, I mean Friday to Monday inclusive) with Vic's Parents-in-Law.
We have been driven round Dartmoor (note: driven round, no stopping and walking, viewing etc) subjected to a constant commentary about... um... er.... Well I wasn't listening, but I'm sure it was fascinating. Maybe Vic can fill you in there.
I now require extensive sympathy and a really, really rude joke....
quote: Originally posted by: DD " I now require extensive sympathy and a really, really rude joke...."
First the sympathy
Next the joke. Best I could find at short notice...
Two parents take their son on holiday and go to a nude beach. The father goes for a walk on the beach and the son goes and plays in the water. The son comes running up to his mum and says..."Mummy, I saw ladies with boobies a lot bigger than yours!" The mum says..."the bigger they are, the dumber they are."
So he goes back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says..."Mummy, I saw men with dingers a lot bigger than Daddy's!" The mum says..."the bigger they are, the dumber they are."
So he goes back to play. Several minutes later he comes running back and says..."Mummy, I just saw Daddy talking to the dumbest lady I ever saw and the more and more he talked, the dumber and dumber he got !"
As i dont have t'internet access in the house my weekend visits are next to non existent
But this weekend was too busy for interwebbing anyway - out on friday nite with guys i used to go to school with - scary moment with girl who had a boyfriend near by!
Went to the beach on saturday - the sea was FREEZING, played football and lay about in the sun - took it easy on saturday nite because - I was in work from 9.30 in the morning til 6.30 at nite lugging servers about the place and dismantling shelves, putting servers in the new rack blah blah blah, then rush home - clean up run round to my mate Kates house for dinner - drinks, head to pub to meet other Lyric theatre staff, more drinks, club, more drinks, snog Kates sister (who i used to go out with), back to a mates house, drinks, bed
Monday - sleep for ages, get up, go to other mates house, watch Kill Bill Vol 1, eat, go to cinema to watch Kill Bill Vol 2, home, iron clothes, eat, bath, go to bed early
See, no time for the internet - i am shattered no though
I've been stitting twiddling my thumbs all day cos I got in to find my system password had been revoked. When I phoned the nohelpdesk to get it reset, it turns out that their servers been shut down beacuse it's acquired worms, so they can't reset it. So I've had no computer all day.
One for the King
Information overload.
