What film would you remake?

Henglegert Rinkerdink · Sorry... I must have the wrong street.

What film would you remake?

Henglegert Rinkerdink · Sorry... I must have the wrong street.

I might actually remake Superman too ... replacing Superman with Batman and all the crap stuff with cool stuff. :)

Truckman · Old. But wise!

I've often thought about a remake of "Thunder Road" but how does one improve on perfection?......Ben

sha76jam · Cpt Acorn Short of An Oaktree

Surely you should really only remake films that were done badly the first time around?

Apparently they've remade Footloose, they should really leave classic eighties cheese alone.

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

I'd remake the 1932 movie 'Scarface' with maybe someone like Al Pacino in the title role. I'd stick a whole bunch of gratuitous violence and boobs in it!

Oh, or maybe I could remake The Hidden Fortress, but set it in space, with space battles and laser swords!

Or I could follow the trend of remaking perfectly good foreign movies - maybe redo the classic 1991 French spy movie 'La Totale', casting Arnold Schwarzneggar in the lead role and turning it into an over the top action move. And maybe stick a Jamie Lee Curtis strip-tease in for laughs!

Or I suppose I could stop being facetious and answer properly...

Nah...

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

sha76jam wrote:
they should really leave classic eighties cheese alone.

I try to leave classic 80's cheese alone as much as possible. Ugh.

JonnyStead · **"I'm Lois!"**

I'd remake Rambo 2&3 because they water down the 'darkness' of Rambo too much. The stories are fine - I'd rather just have them explore the psyche of the protaganist more

I'd also remake Batman Begins so it goes something like this -

Bruce Wayne's parents get killed
Bruce grows up realising he has to live without his parents
Bruce works out he has billions of dollars to play with
Bruce gets over the death of his parents, quick smart, blows $1bn on parties and whores, and dies at 22 in a crack den in Gotham, in a pool of his own vomit -

which is what would have happened...

In the meantime, Superman would swoop in and deal with the so called Gotham 'villains' in an afternoon (they are after all just nutcase mortals with no real skills) - returning Gotham to a normal city with average crime rates, on his way to dealing with problems worthy of a comic!

(sorry)

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

JonnyStead wrote:
In the meantime, Superman would swoop in and deal with the so called Gotham 'villains' in an afternoon (they are after all just nutcase mortals with no real skills) - returning Gotham to a normal city with average crime rates, on his way to dealing with problems worthy of a comic!

(sorry)

Of course, like most Superman movies, this would be such a horrible yawn fest that everyone would go next door to see my remake of Mamma Mia in which The Punisher systematically wipes out everyone in the film for their muscical crimes against humanity!

sha76jam · Cpt Acorn Short of An Oaktree

But Mamma Mia wouldn't have been nearly so funny if they'd cast people who could actually sing!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Funny? I thought it was a psychological thriller. I mean the audience never knows whether they're going to make it through the film without brain damage or if they'll just live a lifetime of regret for wasting a couple of hours of their life watching it. Either way, they'll probably need therapy.

Back on the subject of remakes... I wonder If I'd ever be persuaded to remake Badman... nah... it was a perfect movie. It could never be improved upon!

Incidentally, for Sharon and Ben, here's the blog post I wrote yesterday that was directly inspired by this thread.

JonnyStead · **"I'm Lois!"**

ddvmor wrote:
Of course, like most Superman movies, this would be such a horrible yawn fest that everyone would go next door to see my remake of Mamma Mia in which The Punisher systematically wipes out everyone in the film for their muscical crimes against humanity!

You're right - it would be a yawn fest, because the Gotham villains would offer no challenge to Supes whatsoever (apart from possibly The Joker because he is the best villain in the DC universe, but he would need the pesky green mineral). Bain throwing his weight around with Supes would be funny though!

I would though pay to see Mamma Mia vs Punisher, in fact I would probably invest to make it happen! it would be awesome to see all of them get horribly destroyed.

Henglegert Rinkerdink · Sorry... I must have the wrong street.

JonnyStead wrote:
You're right - it would be a yawn fest, because the Gotham villains would offer no challenge to Supes whatsoever (apart from possibly The Joker because he is the best villain in the DC universe, but he would need the pesky green mineral). Bain throwing his weight around with Supes would be funny though!

That's why he's boring though ... he's an goody-two-shoes judgemental alien. There's no "story" to him ... homeworld blew up, landed here, apparantly our sun makes him more or less indestructable, he takes this to mean he can impose his moral structure on everyone around him because no one can stop him ... yadda yadda yadda ... look at me on in my red pants.

I know he's popular, and if you like him fair enough ... but for me he's just a propaganda machine that got out of control.

Although he's nice to Swamp Thing, so I'll give him that ... :)

I'd remake Superman as a dinosaur. He's an alien after all, why should he look human ... make him a dinosaur ... a flying Afrovenator ... that would be awesome. Swooping down and biting Lex's head off ... game over man, game over.

JonnyStead · **"I'm Lois!"**

Lols Bezzy -

You just dont get it, man! ;o)

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Yeah, Hengle. You just don't understand. Let me make it simple for you:

Stead is teh ghey for Superman. He loves Superman and wants to kiss him.

Truckman · Old. But wise!

ddvmor wrote:
Incidentally, for Sharon and Ben, here's the blog post I wrote yesterday that was directly inspired by this thread.

Thanks to that I learned two things this morning:

1.) I now know what a blog is...

2.) I now know why I was never curious enough to find out before now...

...Ben

sha76jam · Cpt Acorn Short of An Oaktree

Truckman wrote:
ddvmor wrote:
Incidentally, for Sharon and Ben, here's the blog post I wrote yesterday that was directly inspired by this thread.
Thanks to that I learned two things this morning:
1.) I now know what a blog is...
2.) I now know why I was never curious enough to find out before now...

...Ben

Hmmm, I skimmed.

Hengle, when are you starting work on your reinterpretation of Superman? It'll be the first one I've ever wanted to watch!

ddvmor · **I am the Jammie King!**

Must be about time for a new cartoon...

Henglegert Rinkerdink · Sorry... I must have the wrong street.

sha76jam wrote:

Hengle, when are you starting work on your reinterpretation of Superman? It'll be the first one I've ever wanted to watch!

Soon, verry soon.

My "star" is demanding 60kg of meat a day in payment, but I can only really manage 40kg. So we are in negotiations.

Of course, if talks break down I'm going to need to find a smaller dinosaur ...

JonnyStead · **"I'm Lois!"**

Henglegert Rinkerdink wrote:
Soon, verry soon.
My "star" is demanding 60kg of meat a day in payment, but I can only really manage 40kg. So we are in negotiations.
Of course, if talks break down I'm going to need to find a smaller dinosaur ...

just film a lizard close up - and slow the film down. Simples.

Or a dog...

Henglegert Rinkerdink · Sorry... I must have the wrong street.

No, no, no Jonny ... if somethings worth doing, it's worth doing properly. :)

I'm in negotiations with a Carcharodontosaurus who seems more amenable.

Truckman · Old. But wise!

Henglegert Rinkerdink wrote:
No, no, no Jonny ... if somethings worth doing, it's worth doing properly. :)

I'm in negotiations with a Carcharodontosaurus who seems more amenable.

So many domestic Komodo dragons out of work and you want to import a Carcharodontosaurus...No wonder the welfare rolls are overloaded... disbelief ...Ben

sha76jam · Cpt Acorn Short of An Oaktree

Hey dinosaurs aren't renowned for their gourmet tendancies, just get really cheap meat that's pumped up with water. Actually, no, wait! Is he happy eating people? I can think of a few who would be suitable...

Aodan · Teiam Member

yes, I can definitely contribute to the "eat these people" stockpile..