The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
A Ministry of Defence worker mislaid their automatic pistol in the toilets of a Sainsbury's store, say police.
The weapon, a Sig Sauer 9mm, was left at the store in Bancroft, Hitchin, on Saturday evening and has so far not been found, said Hertfordshire Police.
A police spokesman said the weapon was loaded with 13 rounds of blank ammunition, but could cause injury.
Police have been searching areas near the store and have advised members of the public not to touch it.
Anyone with information about the weapon is asked to call Hertfordshire Police.
James Bond never left his gun in the loos. On the other hand, I'm not convinced he ever went to Sainsbury's...
Maybe it could be a plot for the new Bond movie. Bond loses his gun in the toilets and has to retreive it before a master criminal uses it to... er... take over the world.