The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Last night my wife was putting the boys to bed when she called me up cos they were hearing a nasty rustling-moving-about type sound coming from the loft.
She told me to go up and check. Now my loft has yet to be converted, floored or even have a light put in, its the type of loft that monsters and skeletons and stuff live in, and as it was wild with wind and rain outside, I was like, no way!
But i thought Id better do it, so there I was, half way up a ladder and hopin a monster wouldn't get me. Know what it was? A toy jamed between the boys' bunkbed fram and the wall, evertime they turned in bed it grated along the wall, and did actually sound like it was in the loft!
