The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Prompted by the JDKs piccy, I suppose I should tell everybody about the weekend excitement. Saturday night. I was gaming with JDK, Lite and Stead. Calvin informed me that a smoke alarm had been screaming for 20 mins, and she could smell smoke.
What are the British procedures for such an emergency, she enquired. (I am sure they have better ones in Germany...)
I abandoned the game (the gamers were, naturally, terribly concerned as to our safety), and called the fire boys. 3 minutes went by and suddenly our house was overun with very large fireman examining the source of our concern in the garden. They then charged through every neighbouring house until they found the alarm while we watched (a bit sheepishly, I might add, as lights went on in sleepy houses). Helicopters were reported.
The the alarm stopped and we don't really know what happened next.
I think we did a neighbourly thing...but not really sure if there was a real fire or not...
I think I can officially declare you a hero. I'd like to think that if my neighbours suspected that my house was on fire or being burgled or something, that they'd dial 999. Sadly, these days, most people would simply pretend nothing was happening, or twitch the curtains and tut - assuming that they'd read about it in the local paper later.
Being woken up in the night is a small price to pay if it means that your house and all you belongings will be saved from burning!
Reminds me of another couple of anecdotes from years ago (yes, it's officially Really Old Anecdote Day):
I was happily asleep in my bed, when I heard a sharp knock knock knocking on my front door at around 2am. So I fell out of bed and shambled wearily to the door, noting as I did so, the blue flashing lights just outside.
Upon opening the door, I saw two concerned look police officers who asked me if everything was ok. It seems that 999 had been dialled from my phone, and that no message had been left - it's the police's policy to follow up 'dead' 999 call in case it's something nasty. I assuured them that all was well, and we chalked it up to experience - one of those things...
...until a few days later, that is. I received a call at work, again from the police. It seems that the same thing had happened again during the morning and two officers attended my property. When they couldn't get in, they looked through the window to see that everything was ok.
The officer on the phone then read a portion of the report that had been filed, which went something like this:
"Upon looking through the window we observed two cats engaged in what appeared to be sexual activity and put the emergency call down to overly enthusiatic foreplay on the cats' part."
I should clarify that when they were young, Rochester had a nasty habit of trying to... er... rape Ellie. Not nice.
Anyway, it turned out that there was a fault on the BT line, which got repaired and nothing more was heard about it!
As for the other anecdote, I was once evacuated from my house because a man down the way had 16 bottles of acetelyne gas in his garage and, being an unusually hot day, was concerned that they might explode and called the police. I was told to leave. Immediately. Or I might die!
"Upon looking through the window we observed two cats engaged in what appeared to be sexual activity and put the emergency call down to overly enthusiatic foreplay on the cats' part."
That was the best thing I have read all day.
Good show Copper - I would hope that if anything nasty was ever going on at my place - my neighbors would be as vigilent
