The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
So, I was talking to a lady at the bus stop who told me that she was taking the afternoon off to go to her daughter's sports day at school.
Apparently, these days thay don't have races any more because they don't want to encourage competition amongst the pupils.
Can someone explain why schoolkids shouldn't compete? Surely if they don't learn about competition on the 'safe' evironment of the school, they won't be prepared for it in the big, wide, competitive world. Competition is everywhere. We compete for jobs, the remote control, the shortest queue in Tesco. Our work life is a series of competitive targets. It concerns me that we'll end up with a generation of apathetic non-competitive kids whe will all end up on the dole, because the stress of competing for job is just too much for 'em.
Or maybe I'm wrong and there's a good reason for it? Somebody tell me, please!
Just think about the playground equipment that we grew up on. Steel bars over ROCKS. It got about 80900000 degrees in the sun - you haven't lived until you've had your butt welded to a slide in the middle of june - and I knew at least a dozen kids who got concussions from falling off the equipment or banging their heads on the steel and sheet metal thing that was supposed to look like a firetruck... but we lived to tell the tale! We had toys with little parts and we choked on them! We ate lead paint chips! We got our heads stuck in crib bars! We had toys that included melting plastic! We baked cakes with lightbulbs!
Now playground equipment is made of plastic - with spongey mats underneath, toys are all rounded and there are no little bits, e-z bake and shrinky dinks have gone the way of ebay and sports day has no actual sports...
Personally I miss swings. You are hard pressed to find any swings around that have more than a 8 or so foot cross bar. I miss the swings where you could get super high on them then jump out and break your arm......those were the days.
