The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
My night was eventful - for all the wrong reasons.
At 3am I woke up to the sound of unscrupulous pompey youths destroying something large and metallic outside my bedroom window. I peeked out and saw that the object was, in fact, my German housemates beloved bicycle.
Armed with nothing but 3am bravery, I marched out in my pyjamas (all 5'2'' of me) after waking German housmate and instructing her to look after the kittens, intent on retrieving the bicycle. Not entirely sure why I thought I was best up to the task... Anyway, I march out. Luckily, the criminals had scarpered in awe at my wrath (ahem, or got bored and moved on to something more challenging) and left us to pick up the pieces of the bike and drag them inside.
Fine. We went to bed, irked. When I say we, I should add that the kittens are wide awake and alert, excited by the unexpected flurry of activity in the night. They spent the rest of it thundering around (I am seriously concerned that Chester might have ADD) destroying stuff. My book, for example, is in tatters.
I had to share this with you all, for sympathy and acknowledgment of my bravery (and tiredness..).
I'f i'd been on of those nasty little buggers, I feel certain that I'd have been rooted to the spot in abject fear. It's also possible that I may have peed myself a little.
