The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
So, the other evening I was upstairs doing some important ...er... web development (ok, ok, I was playing City of Heroes again!) when I heard the TV downstairs come on. This was something of an odd event, given that, apart from the cats and the rabbit, I was alone in the house.
Upon investigating the cause of this phenomenon, I discovered Rochester stiing on the sofa watching the television intently whith his backside parked firmly on the remote control. He was watching Granada Men & Motors, a channel that pays lip service to it's title preferring instead to show images of topless ladies doing interesting things beside swimming pools.
This isn't the first time I've caught Rochester watching porn and I suspect that it won't be the last. What's a man to do?
"When a boy reaches a certain age, he gets particular urges that only soft porn can satisfy. It's only right and proper that you should see women as sexual objects, fit only for your own gratification."
