The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Hang on... Isn't chocolate made from nuts? Or is it beans? Don't beans make you fart? Which means chocolate makes you fart. Good for your heart, then. Other things that make one fart are chilli (also involves beans) and curry (whatich may or may not contain nuts).
I'll take the pills now.
Argh. That men in white coats are coming for me! Help!