The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
When Stead told me about his new cat, I warned him: Because you have a cat, people will assume that you are obsessed with cats and wish to be surrounded by cat paraphernalia (or tat, if you prefer). You will receive cat themed birthday and christmas cards. People will buy you cat ornaments, cat tea-towels and cat keyrings. You will be inundated with cat coasters, humourous cat books and picture frames with cats (or possibly fish bones) on them.
Catfish briefly suffered the same thing when Rochester moved in with her.
Anyway. To celebrate your induction into the horrible world of cat tat, here is a cat youtube video.
