The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
Ironing sucks. I don't know anyone who likes ironing. It's a universally shite job. Catfish avoids it by only buying clothes that don't need to be ironed. Unfortunately, for a bloke in an office, there's no getting away from having to iron a bunch of shirts every now and again.
So last night I was faced with the task of ironing several shirts for the next week or so. I'm a bit rubbish at ironing - it ususally takes me ages to finish a shirt. So it was incrdibly irritating to discover that the first shirt I ironed had a stain on the sleeve that the wash hadn't got out. It was even more irritating to discover this after I had ironed everything but this sleeve. I couldn't have discovered the stain when I started the shirt - oh no. That would be too easy. It has to be on the very last part of the shirt that I iron. like it was hiding. F!&^£er.
And then it happened again. Two shirts in a row. As you can imagine, I was deeply unimpressed. Pff.
lol sorry mate I shouldnt laugh - thankfully I think I can iron a shirt in about 2 minutes so I tend to do a shirt in the morning - I agree though that its a ridiculous state of affairs that we've all got into the habit of ironing. If we all just put the iron down and said "stuff this, this is stupid" we could all save hours and hours a year by just not doing it.
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I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
Two minutes is ages to iron a shirt. My Gran astounded me once (a few years ago) by producing a perfectly pressed shirt in about 20 seconds - and I don't mean pressed like you or I would press a shirt - this was perfectly creaseless, even on the sleeves. It was amazing to watch - only you couldn't because her hands were moving faster then the speed of light.
My grandmother was a whiz at ironing. Like yours, she could perfectly press ANYTHING in seconds. Unfortunately, that was a skill that passed with her. I can't iron anything bigger or more complex than a handkerchief.
Are you telling me that you folks don't have a dry cleaner close by?...Barbarians!...Why, here they're almost as common as the corner gun store...Sounds like a business opportunity for someone......Ben
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"It must be mounted on a tripod!...It must be mounted on a tripod!" - Cmdr. Frederick Mohr
My mistake...It's $1.19 (not $1.25) per shirt laundered and ironed...Also colder weather is almost gone so I'll get all my jackets (including the leather) cleaned soon...Ben
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"It must be mounted on a tripod!...It must be mounted on a tripod!" - Cmdr. Frederick Mohr
It was even more irritating to discover this after I had ironed everything but this sleeve. I couldn't have discovered the stain when I started the shirt - oh no. 
That would be too easy. It has to be on the very last part of the shirt that I iron. like it was hiding. F!&^£er.
...Ben
...Ben
