The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
My extended family were all on holiday together last week. My parents, my grandparents, a couple of aunts, an uncle and an unnatural number of cousins all took up residence in a cottage in Cornwall. Some of them were supposed to be moving on to St Ives this week where me and Catfish and my little bro and his girlfriend were gonna join em.
The day before I was due to leave for St Ives, I got a call from my Gran from her house in Bristol. Not Cornwall. Bristol. She was supposed to be in Cornwall.
Anyway, it turns out that my mum and one of my Aunts had an enormous row about baked potatoes (apparently) that resulted in everyone going home and my parents going on to St Ives all on their own and swearing never to talk to the rest of the family again. Honestly, it was like walking into my own private episode of Eastenders!
So now my mum is all grumpy and trying to drag us into their conflict which is probably at least 50% her own fault!
Does anyone else here have problems with their families acting like overly tired seven year olds high on sugar and fighting over their favourite toy?
Yep - today in fact I had to remind my brother to ask my Dad what he would like for his birthday (soon) and he replied that he didnt want to because he didnt like the presents my Dad and his wife buy either him or HIS wife...
I told him not to let become a 'thing' and also reminded him that HIS wife is annoying french bi@ch though the second part I mostly did just in my head...
__________________
I'll take arrogance and the inevitable hubris over self-doubt and lack of confidence.
"Everyone has a plan, until they get punched in the face" - Mike Tyson
I'm glad it's not just me, then. Shall we for a 'dumb ass family' support group? We could call it the 'dumb ass family support group bored board' or 'jdbb' for short!
Shall we for a 'dumb ass family' support group? We could call it the 'dumb ass family support group bored board' or 'jdbb' for short! 
