The following Dodgers have been smited by the JDK for their crimes against Jam:
All the girls! for picking on the JDK and damaging his already delicate self esteem!
The Basserd Who Nicked Copper's Stuff For the offense of nicking Copper's stuff. You are a tw*t, whoever you are and we all hope you get run over by a tram in Nottingham. Or Liverpool. Or whereever else they have trams!
Copper For the crime of playing with her Wii instead of her Jammie pals!
I've just had to complete a questionnaire on the state of my workstation, chair, display equipment and the like. Now given that we're a great big financial institution that's been around for centuries and likes to brag about how we're a 'high peformance' organisation and 'investors in people' and the like, it was somewhat surprising (alright, not surprising... more like resigned sigh/eye roll inducing) that the form looked like it had been put together by a five year old, then photocpied about 1500 times in an effort to make it even less legible.
Now this is a pretty simple tick box form. Not much can go wrong with that, you'd think. Except that there are more boxes than questions on at least two of the pages. At one point it asks me if I can use my PC without twisting my trunk. My trunk? What am I, an elephant? Bloody trunk.
get this, we have to do the same on an annual basis, and we work in a hot desking environment. Some of the smart (ass) members of my team have started to ask if they should really be filling one every day.
I kinda struggle with that before spouting some crap about it being the principle of the matter, and an annual check will improve their self awareness of WRULD.
